In the Name of God, the Kind, the Beautiful
Most Precious, Beautiful, Kind, Loving, Merciful, and Gracious Lord; O God, our Precious Beloved Lord; Ruler of the Heavens and the Earth; Kind Guide to all those on Your Path:
Lord, the month of fasting has come to an end, and as You know, I cannot say that I will not feel happy. This year has been particularly difficult for me to complete. I have strained at the difficulty of having to wait for the long (and frequently hot) day to finish before I can finally eat and drink. Then, I strain at having very little time to eat and drink before I have to stop again.
I feel terrible for my straining this past month. You have been so Beautiful, so Kind, so Merciful, so Compassionate, so Wonderful to me for all these years…and I strain when I have to fast the day for only one month out of the year. I feel terrible, Lord, for it is clear that I am also not truly free.
I know that You understand that fasting is difficult, and that is why You have pledged to reward us for it. Nevertheless, I feel terrible for not having fasted with a huge smile on my face, with happiness that I am not eating and drinking for Your sake. Perhaps I ask too much of myself, but when it is for You, I think it is worth it.
So, my Beautiful Precious Lord, I ask that You look past my straining and accept the fasts that I tried so hard to faithfully fulfill . Please look past my weaknesses as a human being, my hypocrisy that I live each day, and accept my striving on your path. Please accept the fact that I did thirst and strain at having to fast, but that I tried to do it for You. Please accept my recitation of the Qur’an during the holy month of Ramadan. Please accept the cycles of prayer that I offered for You during this month. Please accept the night vigils that I tried to perform for Your sake.
Lord, please forgive my shortcomings during this month. Please forgive the many sins that I committed during Ramadan. Please forgive the mistakes that I made while I was trying to be good to You. Please look past all the ways I fall short of Your Way and accept me into Your Presence and Garden.
Lord, do not let the blessings of this month, which I took for granted, to pass by me when the days and nights of holiness are long gone. Please, do not take away all that Grace, and Mercy, and Beauty, and Kindness, and Graciousness once the calendar continues on. Please continue to show me that Most Beautiful Face that You have always shown me and continue to bless me for all my life, for all my time.
O God our Lord, I wish I had been better during this Ramadan. I wish I had fasted with a big smile on my face. I wish I had no feelings of dread as the month of Ramadan approached. I wish I jumped for joy when I found the month of fasting upon me.
Nevertheless, O Lord, I tried my best to fast because it was You who told me to do so. I did my best, my Lord, so please accept it from me.
O God my Lord, I love You. I may not show it in the best way, but I really do. I know You know this, but I like to say it anyway. And I know You love me, because if You didn’t, You would not have given me life when I was dead. And so, my Lord, I will try my best to stay true to your path for all the days that I live.
My Precious Beloved Lord, the month of Ramadan is over, and I cannot say I won’t be happy to have that cup of coffee when the sun is rising high into the sky. I cannot say I won’t be happy to be able to play golf and drink coffee or diet soda at the same time. I cannot say I won’t be happy to be able to eat before the sun sets. But, please, Lord, accept me with all my weakness, all my frailty, all my hypocrisy.
I am trying my best, O Lord, so please accept me. And I end with one of my most favorite passages of Your Most Holy Word:
Limitless in His glory is thy Lord, the Lord of Almightiness, [exalted] above anything that men may devise by way of definition! And peace be upon all His Message-bearers! And all praise is due to God alone, the Sustainer of all the worlds! (37:180-183)
In Your Most Holy Name do I say this, Amen.